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April 23, 2018, 05:30:06 pm

Author Topic: 2018 AA Club - Week 13  (Read 152 times)

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2018 AA Club - Week 13
« on: April 16, 2018, 04:53:01 pm »
Background: The Australian cricket team has been thrust into the limelight following a ball tampering incident in a test match in South Africa. The scandal has left the team's reputation in tatters.

We are not teaching our children well

No Roger Frankel, life should not just go on (Letters, 28/3) for the cricket debacle is a sharp pointer to what is happening in the wider Australian society. We have lost our moral compass. Look at the headlines – a commission to examine behaviour in our banks, major companies paying no tax, concessions for the wealthy costing us $6billion, fake news, a growing class system in our schools, the exploitation of our environment, a quarter of our children living in poverty, condemnation from the UN and around the world on how we treat refugees, our obesity crisis, the lack of trust in governments, the business world and in organisations generally. The list goes on. What sort of lessons are we teaching our children and grandchildren? What sort of world will they inherit?

Bryan Long, Balwyn

It's about more than ball tampering

Greg Baum is right– "they just don't get it". This is now personified by James Sutherland announcing the result of his discipline dash to South Africa – what a weak-kneed response to a stain that is going to haunt Australians for years to come. Sutherland has failed, once again, to see what we, the cricket lovers and fans, see very clearly. This event is a culmination resulting from years of a rotten culture driven from within and above by a need to win at all costs.
Sure James, buy yourself some time, send some home, take the heat out. But you just don't get it. Australians want action now and how you can leave Darren Lehman in his position is a joke. Don't you understand that the ball tampering is just a symptom of a cancer that affects his team. Adam Gilchrist has it right when he states that Australian cricket is now a laughing stock around the world, and this calculated and anaemic response from Cricket Australia endorses such. I feel sorry for Steve Smith but he is a product of a naïve young man living inside a bubble where right and wrong has ceased to exist. At the very least Lehman should have been stood down. This event is just not about ball tampering. It is about honesty, trust, responsibility, accountability, and yes pride.

Paul Burchill, Attwood
2017 ATAR: 99.70

English essay correction (Medea and Argument Analysis)
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Re: 2018 AA Club - Week 13
« Reply #1 on: April 17, 2018, 05:43:42 pm »
This is really embarrassing, but I genuinely didn't see the picture until I logged on!!! So I was just writing as if there was no image similar to what we had in the previous weeks!! I'm really very sorry!! I feel so stupid!
But I'm definitely going to write 3 lines later analysing the image and linking it to the letters to the editor. For now, this is my writing without the image analysis:

After the Australian cricket team declared responsibility for their ball tampering scandal in a test match in South Africa, national reprimand of Cricket Australia and their lack of consideration of sportsmanship has been at the forefront of discourse. Bryan Long from Balwyn has written a letter to the editor and in a disappointed tone, he contends that a lack of moral conscience is not only evident in sport, but is precariously poised from within a range of sectors in our life- such as humanitarian issues, health and the media. Similarly, Paul Burchill from Attwood is also utterly dissatisfied with Australian cricketers threatening their sport’s reputation because of their constant desire to win, however, Burchill tone changes as he sympathises with the cricket captain.

Criticising an array of sectors where there exists some immorality, Long worries about the negative influence that the cricketers have on present day youth. Using inclusive language as he generalises that “we are not teaching our children well” and that “we have lost our moral compass,” Long attempts to melodramatically target everyone in society as being responsible for the cricket scandal, which is just one of the symbols of underlying societal dishonesties. His very complex sentence which is essentially a list of areas where he believes that there exists dishonesty, such as when “major companies [do not pay] any tax” and “condemnation of UN,” is in fact totally unrelated to parents and his previous appeal to parenting values. By perplexing parents in this way, Long aims to hypnotise the adult populous that every perceived evil in society is essentially linked to whether the person in the wrong was morally raised as a child or not. Using the cricketers who were involved in the scandal as examples, Long’s interrogative “What sort of world will [children and grandchildren] inherit?” seeks to conjure an uncertain and volatile image of a future where the following generation adults will likely follow suit with behaving immorally in their world, since they were exposed to it when they were younger. Ending on this note, the questions are also likely to urge present day parents to foster morality in their homes, so that Long’s pessimistic warning of an amoral future will be mitigated.

Similar to how Long condemns Cricket Australia’s corruption and extends to a societal locale, Burchill also criticises those that seek to take lightly the blow and disappointment to cricket fans that has been caused by the ball tampering scandal. Like Long, he observes that immorality is a “culmination resulting from years of a rotten culture…driven by a need to win at all costs,” – the adjective “rotten” suggesting that the Australian culture has lost its proud reputation and has become maliciously cold due to the lack of ethics. He does this through using a metaphor to depict the scandal as “a stain that is going to haunt Australians for years to come.” The frightening and hurtful connotations behind “stain” and “eerie” and this affecting the nation’s citizens, aim to evoke fear and guilt in the minds of those who were involved in the scandal, and also those like “James Sutherland” who try to take lightly the betrayal of approving qualities in Burchill’s list – “honesty, trust, responsibility, accountability and yes pride.” Just like how Long worries about the future for youth who are exposed to such kinds of cheating like in the ball tampering, Burchill too, is pessimistic about Cricket Australia improving from this experience. By using medical terminology to present the scandal as a “cancer that affects [Lehman’s] team” and quoting Gilchrist’s quote that the scandal is “anaemic” Burchill aims to lampoon Cricket Australia’s leadership committee and implies that they are patients suffering from severe and irreparable diseases. In this way, the leadership team is urged to dismiss Daren Lehman from his position, so to free Cricket Australia of the disease-like atmosphere that has been created by the scandal, and so that the lost pride in the national spirit of cricket – Cricket Australia is now a “laughing stock around the world” – can be restored.

Contrary to Long, Burchill shifts his tone to a more sympathetic and pitiful one as he concludes. The imagery and a sense of entrapment that is pursued to amongst readers as they imagine “Steve Smith…a naïve young man living inside a bubble where right and wrong has ceased to exist” aims to garner sympathy for the reader. Also, the agentless passive in “has ceased to exist” omits the blame on people who have caused a disruption to moral conscience, and in this way, aims to bring Smith in equity of those who have not even been mentioned, thus implying that his culpability may be very little and negligible. Juxtaposing Smith as “a naïve young man” amidst this “bubble” that likes morality, Burchill strives to persuade readers and especially social media commentators the need to step back a little from criticising the captain and to let him have his freedom to learn from his mistake.

Thus, although both Long and Burchill castigate the lack of righteousness behind this scandal, Burchill takes on a sympathetic persona and presents hope for Australian cricket fans that the cricketers will learn from their mistake. This is unlike Long who is still perturbed about the future and the negative stigma this scandal carries in youth fans’ minds.


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Re: 2018 AA Club - Week 13
« Reply #2 on: April 20, 2018, 10:18:09 pm »
Analysing the cartoon gave me a headache, and so I gave up. Please don't be too harsh on me. It'd be great if someone could do a sample analysis of the cartoon though. If any critics are feeling generous, please also give me a mark out of ten. Thanks in advance for all your hard work.

A cricket scandal involving ball tampering, and the subsequent actions from those "from within and above" has caused quite a backlash from the public. In a letter to the editor, both Long and Burchill take the same stance in saying that ball tampering is just one in a long list of corruptive actions, although they differ in their approaches. This is in the accompaniment of a cartoon also. While Long chooses to focus on the impacts on people's immediate family, Burchill targets the cricket community, from fans to Cricket Australia.

Long begins by contending that the ball tampering incident is just the most recent manifestations of Australia's descent into immorality. By directly attacking Roger Frankel's point of view, Long asserts in which direction his "moral compass" lies, while simultaneously calling out those who oppose his views as having lost their sense of what's right and wrong.  By setting up this dichotomy that forces people to either agree or disagree, he appeals to readers' sense of morality. As evidenced by news headlines, he makes parallels with the ever growing list that exemplify this, from tax evasion to government corruption, thereby positioning readers to come to the realisation of how commonplace immoral actions have become. Furthermore, the use of inclusive language aids in his argument that this is an issue that affects all Australians, which is followed up by a series of rhetorical question that call upon a parent's protective instincts of their children, in which he implies that if this downward trend continues, it's our "children and grandchildren" who'll have to face the consequences, who might become impervious to such things, or worse yet, view it as something normal or even morally sound. By expanding the situation to encompass other similar incidents, Long positions the readers to apply the negative attitudes that they have for these other incidents to ball tampering.

Following this, Burchill first addresses the root problem, the "rotten culture", in order to exploit how it's "the need to win at all costs," that has caused this debacle, so readers are made aware of the bigger picture at hand. By asserting that "Baum is right - "they just don't get it", the compounded effect of having more than one person agree to something results in people being more inclined to agree with Burchill. He then uses words such as "stain" and "haunt" which have a negative connotation, in order to argue that this incident is a bigger deal than it's made to be, and will be remembered by the people for a long time, and not in a good way either. By contending that the relationship between ball tampering and corruption is analogous to a symptom of cancer, Burchill effectively positions to view this incident as part of disease that could potentially lead to the team's end, which would work to elicit fear in both the audience and members of the cricket team, of what the future might hold if this trend were to continue, and so pushes Sutherland to take action to prevent it. Then by making the generalisation that all "Australians want action now", readers are positioned to want a change also while also condemning Sutherland for his actions, or lack thereof.

In a disparaging tone, Burchill criticises Sutherland's lack of action, by belittling Sutherland's act of "buying himself some time, send some home, take the heat out", a phrase that emanates cowardice as it's a only a temporary fix that doesn't solve to issue at hand. Burchill builds on this by calling Sutherland's actions a "weak kneed" "dash", which has the negative effect of portraying him as a weakling, a "failure" not worthy of "cricket lovers' and fans'" respect. Then by listing out values such as "honesty, trust responsibility, accountability and yes pride", which Burchill sees as synonymous with morality, he pushes the audience to evaluate for themselves whether these traits are present within Sutherland. However, these are also a list of traits that he also deems Sutherland must show in order to right his wrongs. This shows that he's still leaving room for Sutherland and Cricket Australia to redeem themselves, especially when he claims that the "very least" they could do was to make "Lehman… stand down", following his attack at Sutherland's credibility by claiming it's a "joke" that "he left Lehman in his position". This is a challenge directed at Sutherland, who would therefore want to take steps to correct his misdeeds, after being made a "laughing stock around the world", words which would drive him to remove that label.

Along with the two letter to the editors is a cartoon. This stain removal guide uses humour to give a refreshing take on how corruption within various parts of Australian society will lead to its doom. By doing so, readers can view the situation from another perspective and gain a better understanding that may be less biased. The cricket ball stain refers to the cricket incident, which is "forgotten", as it's not the main issue. The same can also be said for Tony Abbott's caricature, in which his ears are exaggerated to represent his participation in the electoral riggings. As the white shirt represents purity, morality, the stains on shirts leads readers to believe that there needs to be a cleansing of immorality so that we can return to state of righteousness, but accumulation of stains of questionable origin leads to only one possible solution - burning it, which means that if worst comes to worst, it'll be the end of Australia as we know it.

With both Long and Burchill using informal language to seem relatable, readers are urged to consider the impact of corruption on both a small and large scale, and how it would impact Australia as a whole. While Long is more reliant on scaring the audience into submission, Burchill takes on a tone that mellows out, when he makes a concession for those involved, although only after having attacked at them with scathing words.