💖 Week 1 Year 11: Feb 6th 2021 💖Hello humans!
Hope everyone's doing well and apologies in advance for this very ranty post.
So yes first week complete, of what's gonna be a long year. The first day was kind of like, "Wow, I can't believe I'm actually back at school" and "I kinda haven't been kicked out of the holiday mood". The last days were like "Oh no, I need to do ___ and I haven't
", "How will I catch up?
" , "I can do my homework later ...
". I struggled in the latter half due to some certain ~
stuff~ so it was great to be hit first thing this year (nothing too big). Overall, I'm feeling drained and kinda like I'm behind (even though I'm not really, if that makes sense) and I'm not sure I'm looking forward to school.
One reason I could be feeling inadequate is
Literature. You know how there's usually those 5 people that are always active in class and seem like wise philosophers and everyone else is silent for the most part... those people are really really intimidating for me right now. I'm not sure I'll ever get to that level of depth and understanding and am starting to wonder whether only certain people can do Lit (which does not include me). I enjoy analysis and unravelling the texts but I don't think I'm good enough with words (as my posts already reveal) and I don't have enough original ideas to be that "literature-ey" contributive student that I imagined goes into the subject. Maybe I'll grow and learn to become that vision.
Then again maybe I won't.Also
HHD 3/4 hasn't exactly been what I imagined. I really enjoyed 1/2 but 3/4 seems like a subject with little gain now. It seems unstructured, and the teacher keeps talking about what
VCAA wants on the exam or on the SAC and how x% students missed this specific mark on the exam of 2017 because of ____. I only feel like I'm being taught to get a high score and I'd rather learn ... to learn. The teachers really nice don't get me wrong but I'm just not used to this full on exam mentality. *
Welcome to VCE bluebird.* It's only been a few days (we've just been going over basic health and wellbeing stuff) but it's shocked me especially because I feel more interested in Biology and Methods.
Bio 3/4 was supposed to be super scary with it being one of my less favourite subjects last year. Then when holidays came around I really enjoyed doing the holiday homework. Its structured, interconnected, and just so fascinating. I realise now that when I'm not learning for exams or tests or marks my opinion on subjects completely flip around. I have to say the AN lecture for this was pretty cool and significant in helping me like this subject from the beginning. In class, we haven't done much yet just scientific method. I can't wait to get to the immunity part and the human evolution part...
Methods has also shocked me because... I'm liking it. *gasp* The classes are really quiet but tranquil. We've just gone over basic linear stuff but nothing is new to be honest. It's nice to just be able to work quietly in class which I haven't been able to do for a few years now because the atmosphere for maths was really different.
One subject I'm not sure what to say on is
Chemistry. Teachers nice, class is nice but this subject is sort of just seeming really complicated..? I don't know why but I feel like we are expected to already how to do chemistry the second they explain it. We (everyone else probably already learnt it from tutoring when they were 5 but regardless) were introduced to subshells and I just don't get it. Why? Why does it exist and how? How can I visualise this? It's all just a mystery to me but I will ask questions and try my best in the subject anyway.
Oops I almost left out
English Language . (Please forgive me EngLang) Nothing much to say here because we haven't done anything tbh. But I have no idea how we are going to learn all the metalanguage stuff because it seems like a completely different way of thinking. Currently just going over the very basic stuff. One thing new I learnt was cultural context and situational context? Anyway, can't wait to see where this subject takes me.
Well that's that for the first school week of 2021.
Thank you for reading/skim reading that really long post!
Enjoy your week and take care 🌻
- bluebird