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September 27, 2020, 03:39:04 am

Author Topic: Evolio's VCE Journey  (Read 29429 times)

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Evolio

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Re: Evolio's VCE Journey
« Reply #285 on: July 29, 2020, 07:34:15 pm »
+12
Hello everyone!
Itís been a pretty long time since my last update. Can you believe I used to update this journal every day after coming home from school? This is going to be a long one, so sit back, relax and letís dive right in.

UCAT
Itís been 2 days since I completed my UCAT and honestly Iím so over it. Iím ecstatic that I can just focus on my 4 beautiful subjects without that extra thing.
Deets about experience:
Spoiler
I did it on the Monday so I missed a lit period and my chem sac for this. My dad and I set off about 2 hours before my test appointment and we still had an hour and a half left when we arrived. We waited a bit and finally decided to enter the building. Going in, I was anxiously wondering whether they would have keyboards with the numpad, but it turned out that they had one and the facilities were much better than expected! I was shown to a tiny room and was told to start whenever I was ready. I donít know why but I felt so happy in that moment that I smiled. The writing was horrendously stretched across the screen which was a bit of a shock but I quickly became used to it and started the test. I found VR to be alright in the beginning but after another candidate entered, all hell broke loose. It was super duper distracting because the supervisor entered like 5 timed in total and they were speaking quite loudly.  I lost my concentration and focus and my heart started beating dangerously fast. All hell broke loose. I ended up losing my calm state and completely botched the section. It was tragic. I was relieved for DM because it was a much more relaxing section for me personally. It went alright but some questions were straight up weird. QR was next and the questions were generally easy but I probably lost a lot of my marks due to silly mistakes. AR was alright but I left it with a sinking feeling, thinking Iíd gotten below 800. After that, I was so scared that Iíd failed and my brain just decided to give up. I was thinking about how I mightíve gotten really low due to my poor performance and how everything was a waste, and how all the work Iíd done was wasted. I wasnít really thinking straight in SJ so Iím surprised with the mark I got for the section.
On the drive home, I was super anxious and devastated. My whole mind and body closed up and I was frozen with shock. After my 3rd try, my results were finally available.
Results:
VR: 590 (yuck)
DM: 680
QR: 800
AR: 800
TOTAL: 2870
SJT: 659 (pretty proud of this, actually)

Deep down though, I sort of expected a score around this because I only started mindfully studying for 3-4 weeks. The preparation before that was mindless and I was just doing preparation for the mere sake of it.
According to last yearís percentiles, this would have given me a 92 percentile which I was aiming for BUT, I made a big mistake. I shouldíve aimed higher. It didnít occur to me that if I was to maximise my chances of getting into MonashMed, I had to achieve for the highest. I thought that if I get a 90 UCAT, then Iím definitely going to get an interview offer (provided my ATAR was decent).
After that, for the whole day, my emotions kept fluctuating between sorrow, disappointment, happiness, discomfort, anxiety and joy. All these questions swirled through my mind: what if the percentiles change so drastically that I end up with a super low score? What if I fail my ATAR? Have I just decimated any chances of getting into MonashMed? Why am I like this? Should I be happy or sad? Do I deserve to celebrate? What should I do now? Did I mess up again? DEFINITELY. I kept thinking how if I hadnít gotten distracted, maybe, just maybe I couldíve gotten a 2900 which would have increased my percentile anyhow. Iím still thinking that.
Iím so grateful for my parents for being so supportive. I donít know where Iíd be if it wasnít for them. Iíve just got to focus on maximising my ATAR and forgetting about this experience until the percentiles are released in mid-September. Future me can worry then. Present me needs to focus on the chem sac + ATAR.
After talking with my parents, I rewatched a really nice movie which really calmed me down and marched upstairs to study for my chem sac the next day. The chem sac went alright.

Anyways, Iím not sure if Iíve said this before but Iíve really got to STOP comparing myself to others. Iíve seen so many people achieve/aim for 3000+ scores and that was part of the reason why I started aiming for 3000 myself, because I thought my goals werenít good enough (getting 2880). I didnít always compare myself to others. It came about when I moved to my current school and after going on various forums online, where extremely high achievers were common. It made me think that I wasnít good enough and that I was a Ďbadí person for not getting good study scores or good sac marks. I need to drill into my mind that this is MY journey and everyoneís journey is different. I might fail, yes, but I might also succeed so I need to keep going, focusing on my line of sight rather than other peopleís. I need to live my own life, rather than getting caught up in other peopleís. I need to do this for myself because it is MY LIFE, for crying out loud. I need to be looking after myself.

Okay, onto my glorious VCE subjects. I havenít put any effort whatsoever into any of my subjects lately since Iíve just been preparing for the UCAT. So, as you can imagine, they are real train-wrecks.

Specialist Mathematics
HAHAHA. You have no idea: I totes regret picking up this subject! I wished I had chosen Further instead. Anyways, I got my past sac mark back and I got a 78%. I got this when all I cared about was UCAT, but in class, as I inputted my scores into the calculator, and it churned out that abysmal score, I could feel my soul closing up and my face growing hot. That was very disappointing, Evolio. Very disappointing. So many silly mistakes. I ran out of time. I missed easy marks. Every dumb thing I could possibly do accumulated into this low score. Anyways, Iím over that, but I have my next sac in 12 days. ARGH! You know, Iím actually so angry because when students asked when our next sac was, teachers always said Ďoh, donít worry. Itís like in week 8í. So, I became super relaxed after that. BUT THEN, they dumped a super soon sac date on us and left us crumbling to pieces. It is just one chapter, but itís literally the hardest and most unfamiliar chapter in the entire course: Differential Equations. I hope 12 days is enough to prepare adequately for this sac. I also want to prepare in strict timed conditions because this sacís going to be another of those Ďmodelling sacsí and I really suck at those and they donít give us much time.

Psychology
I got my last sac back. 85. I lost 4 marks, only one more than the last one, but it was out of 27 so it dragged down my percentage quite a lot. I made so many dumb mistakes, as always, despite finishing comfortably on time. The average was 72, I think. My rankís plummeted, for sure. Our school doesnít give us our ranks but Psychologyís my only subject where weíre given the average, so Iím grateful for that. My next sac is in the same week as Specialist (what fun), 2 days later and I better ace that, otherwise my dreams of getting 45+ are crushed. Psychologyís probably the only subject that I still have high hopes for.

Chemistry
Yeah, the sac was ok. I have a feeling I failed it though, because I always do that. 🤦‍♀️We got our last sac back, after 10,000 years. It was so long ago that I didnít care that I got an abysmal score. That, and also, everyone did bad so itís fine. I didnít answer questions properly and didnít link back to the question and all that jazz (sweet memories of bio are racing back). Anyways, I HATE organic chemistry. Like, itís so much memorisation and I hate that. Seeing all those reaction pathways for all the different molecules, makes me want to tear my hair out and scream with frustration. Anyways, Iím still aiming for the highest in this subject.

Literature
Ahh, apparently weíre getting our sacs back soon so joy. Weíre just talking about all the different theories, and itís turning my small brain mushy because I canít understand anything thatís going on in class because of UCAT. I need to continue sending feedback to my tutor.

Uni preferences
I know what my first preference is but Iíve also become interested in possibly studying Bachelor of Biomedicine at Melbourne University with a Chancellorís Scholarship. Wow, slow down, Evolio, you know you need a 99.90 ATAR for that, right? AKA, you gotta be MENSA GENIUS smart?! Yeah, I know, dudes, but itís a pretty sweet opportunity and Iím going to try my hardest. Like, if I donít get into MonashMed (which is looking pretty likely), itís a pretty good option to fall back on. Also, Iím thinking of going interstate if I get into unis there. Like, I donít know how Iíll survive but thatís another option, however my mumís hesitant so gotta convince her if things donít work out.

This has gotten really long but I just had to get this down. Also, I found these memes I thought I'd share. The second one is literally me after every assessment before collapsing onto one of my friends. I hope everyone's staying safe! See yas.
Spoiler

2019: Biology [41], Mathematical Methods [38]
2020: Literature, Psychology, Specialist Mathematics, Chemistry

Coolgalbornin03Lo

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Re: Evolio's VCE Journey
« Reply #286 on: July 29, 2020, 08:17:51 pm »
+6
Congrats on the great UCAT score, Evolio!!!!! I could only dream! And you did a Chem sac afterwards?!?!? I think you still have a good chance of getting an interview for monash med (judging from previous years interview offers based ATAR/UCAT scores on MSO) and definitely interstate just keep working at that atar!!!! And take a mini-rest to congratulate yourself on completing the test 😊😊😊
ďIím free to be the greatest one aliveĒ ~ Sia
╔══════════════════════════════╗
2019: Sadly no 3/4s :(
2020: English | Methods | Biology | Chemistry |              Psychology | ATAR: 0
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whys

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Re: Evolio's VCE Journey
« Reply #287 on: July 29, 2020, 08:48:13 pm »
+5
That's a great score, I'm mighty proud! ;D You did amazingly - I get it can be difficult not to compare, and I'm glad you're taking steps to minimise doing that. Also, nice SJT score. 8) Also, now that UCAT is over, you can chill out and take a break (I mean SACs are a thing, but you deserve a break!) As for now, there's nothing you can do about the past and you should definitely focus on what you can do for your future. And with psych (and any subject, really) it's okay to bludge a SAC, you can still do well! You didn't do bad either, and the SAC was only out of 27. I hate when SACs are out of a small number of marks, because each one counts so much more. I prefer SACs with 40 or 50 marks - so much better tbh. Now that UCAT is done, you've got so much more time on your hands! You'll be able to catch up, I believe in you.

Thanks for the cool update, and have a great rest of the week!
P.S. love the memes

Geoo

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Re: Evolio's VCE Journey
« Reply #288 on: July 29, 2020, 09:25:32 pm »
+5
Hey Evolio,

So awesome to see an update from you, I love reading your journal entries!
Congratulations on a wicked UCAT score! You worked so hard all throughout the year, doing practice question after practice question and all your hard work has paid off!  I'm super proud of you, and the best part is, is that you can say goodbye to the UCAT and take some time to chill.

I 100% feel you with chem! Last year I really like organic chem, but wow did I forget how much memorisation was involved! All I want to do is shove the textbook into my head, i'm struggling to remember it all! I'm sure you'll redeem yourself in Pysch, enjoy the rest of your week!
Spoiler
BTW, it's awesome that you're looking at other options like biomed. What pulled you towards it? I use to want to do biomed, but I didn't like how constrictive is was, and wanted a little more freedom in what I wanted to do, so I'm leaning more towards BSci.
VCE Journey: 2019 - 2020
Biology [38], Chemistry, Methods, Food Studies, English.

Evolio

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Re: Evolio's VCE Journey
« Reply #289 on: July 29, 2020, 09:50:01 pm »
+4
Congrats on the great UCAT score, Evolio!!!!! I could only dream! And you did a Chem sac afterwards?!?!? I think you still have a good chance of getting an interview for monash med (judging from previous years interview offers based ATAR/UCAT scores on MSO) and definitely interstate just keep working at that atar!!!! And take a mini-rest to congratulate yourself on completing the test 😊😊😊
Thank you, Elle !! 😊 If I can do it, you can do it! I believe in you!! Yeah, after the chem sac, the first thing I did was collapse onto the sofa haha and started binge-watching a tv show. I really do hope so.

That's a great score, I'm mighty proud! ;D You did amazingly - I get it can be difficult not to compare, and I'm glad you're taking steps to minimise doing that. Also, nice SJT score. 8) Also, now that UCAT is over, you can chill out and take a break (I mean SACs are a thing, but you deserve a break!) As for now, there's nothing you can do about the past and you should definitely focus on what you can do for your future. And with psych (and any subject, really) it's okay to bludge a SAC, you can still do well! You didn't do bad either, and the SAC was only out of 27. I hate when SACs are out of a small number of marks, because each one counts so much more. I prefer SACs with 40 or 50 marks - so much better tbh. Now that UCAT is done, you've got so much more time on your hands! You'll be able to catch up, I believe in you.

Thanks for the cool update, and have a great rest of the week!
P.S. love the memes
Thank you whys! 😊 Yeah, it really drags your whole score down which sucks. Yes, I feel so free!! As soon as I woke up, I was going to login to Medify and do ucat practice...until I realised I'M DONE!! I never have to do a UCAT question ever again (hopefully). Have a great rest of the week too whys!

Hey Evolio,

So awesome to see an update from you, I love reading your journal entries!
Congratulations on a wicked UCAT score! You worked so hard all throughout the year, doing practice question after practice question and all your hard work has paid off!  I'm super proud of you, and the best part is, is that you can say goodbye to the UCAT and take some time to chill.

I 100% feel you with chem! Last year I really like organic chem, but wow did I forget how much memorisation was involved! All I want to do is shove the textbook into my head, i'm struggling to remember it all! I'm sure you'll redeem yourself in Pysch, enjoy the rest of your week!
Spoiler
BTW, it's awesome that you're looking at other options like biomed. What pulled you towards it? I use to want to do biomed, but I didn't like how constrictive is was, and wanted a little more freedom in what I wanted to do, so I'm leaning more towards BSci.
Hey Geoo! Thank you! 😊 Yeah, I think my brain has reached its full capacity so it's struggling to fit all that organic chem. Hopefully, it becomes easier soon for the both of us.
I'm considering Biomed, particularly through the Chancellor's Scholarship pathway, because if I don't get into Med at Monash, I'll still be able to get into Medicine and stay in my home state, even though I'd start Med 2 years later. Also, with Chancellor's, it's guaranteed entry into post-grad med while if I just do Bachelor of Biomedicine with no Chancellor's, I've heard it's super duper competitive to get into post-grad med. Yeah, I guess I'm just considering it because it may lead me towards med, not so much because of the content. BUT, the degree does look pretty interesting by itself anyway.
Although, I can see how Biomed doesn't cover as many subjects as Science would. Are you thinking of doing Bachelor of Science at Melb Uni?
« Last Edit: July 30, 2020, 09:00:10 am by Evolio »
2019: Biology [41], Mathematical Methods [38]
2020: Literature, Psychology, Specialist Mathematics, Chemistry

Geoo

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Re: Evolio's VCE Journey
« Reply #290 on: July 30, 2020, 07:00:15 pm »
+7
Quote
Are you thinking of doing Bachelor of Science at Melb Uni?
I'm a little back and forth to be honest between UniMelb and Monash. I like how at monash I could choose more than one major or dable into to a minor, but at the same time I don't mind the breath system at Melb. So it's a tough one i'm still figuring out. I also haven't seen the campuses, so i'm going in a little blind on my choices and what I read online, but I should hopefully make a decision soon. I can totally see the appeal in the chancellor scholarship and I really hope you're able to get it! That would be such an epic opportunity! Staying in the home state too especially with med is a great idea as well, even if it is an extra two years, i'd rather be in Victoria too (although Uni of Tas does have nice views and hiking trails.....).
Best of luck :)
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homeworkisapotato

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Re: Evolio's VCE Journey
« Reply #291 on: August 02, 2020, 11:21:48 am »
+4
Hi Evolio, that's an amazing UCAT score! also love the second meme ahaha. I'm looking forward to reading more updates  ;D
2020: Biology
2021: Methods, Chemistry, HHD, English, Further

Evolio

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Re: Evolio's VCE Journey
« Reply #292 on: August 14, 2020, 10:02:46 am »
+7
Hi Evolio, that's an amazing UCAT score! also love the second meme ahaha. I'm looking forward to reading more updates  ;D
Thank you!

Hey yíall! 
Itís been a wild ride ever since online school began, yet again and thereís so much uncertainty (still) surrounding VCE but I know we can get through this if we persevere, even though itís easier said than done. Anyways, I donít have sacs for quite some time, so I can finally relax and work at my own pace rather than spending my time aimlessly studying for sacs.

Psychology
I just completed my first online sac and it went surprisingly well enough. It was after school so the day went by really quickly and before I knew it, I was at my desk with my camera propped up, ready to begin the sac (my laptop and mic donít work so I use my phone for synchronous classes). Iím trying not to think about it because itís done and I canít change my performance but random thoughts about what I missed and how many marks Iíve lost are creeping around. Our teacher marks extremely harshly as well, which is excellent as it encourages us to answer questions very well, but itís very difficult to know how many marks you lost. Iím super excited for Mental Health though!! I donít know why but I find mental disorders extremely interesting which sparked the thought of becoming a psychiatrist. However, they got taken off the study design. Very angry about that.  Iíve started reading ahead because Iím anxious to finish the entire course soon so that I can start smashing practice exams. Weíre also working on our research sac which isn't that exciting.
I have really high expectations for this subject and if I actually focus and minimise silly mistakes, I might actually make it. Iím in a much better position compared to my other subjects, and so Iím really betting on this one to carry me.
Exam countdown: 89 days

Chemistry
I love biomolecules! My prior knowledge of biological concepts is really helping me here so biologyís proving to be useful for something. Our next sac is in less than 3 weeks and Iím scrambling to finish the content because Iím behind again. Iím really behind in chem while the whole class is so ahead and I donít know how Iím going to catch up. Iím super grateful to my teacher though because she answers my questions super quickly and in a way that makes sense. I donít really like how online classes are being run for this subject because we donít have any synchronous classes at all. Our teacher makes videos, gives worksheets, quizzes and weíre expected to do them but that doesn't really vibe with me, as I prefer face-to-face real time learning.
Exam countdown: 100 days

Literature.
I got my lit mark back: 45/50 >> 90 %. Not too happy with that as many people achieved way higher scores. If Iím being completely honest, I donít deserve this mark at all as I didnít put much effort into this one and my expression was very poor. I literally wrote my creative piece in one day and I used very simplistic language + poor grammar in my commentary. Our next sac is in less than 3 weeks but not that worried since it's open book which I again, hate. I havenít done much work for lit this year, despite having high hopes for it so I hope I can pull myself together and actually do work for this subject. I donít know what I was doing for the whole year. Where did all the time ago? Like, I still canít write an essay with just my brain in timed conditions.
Exam countdown: 95 days

Specialist Mathematics  :-\
WHY? Our SACís in Term 4 lol so a long way away but Iím so close to finishing the course! I literally have a chapter and a bit to do and Iíve finished the entire thing! So excited, but at the same time, very anxious because itíd be time to smash out some practice questions. Eh, my goals havenít changed much for this subject and if I just target my weak areas, I might be able to pull through with a decent score! All I know is that Iím really going to have to work extremely hard to make up for my poor sac scores.
I brushed this aside in my last entry but my last sac score was extremely bad. I knew I hadnít done well but I didnít expect it to be that bad?!? 😰The work I did wasnít enough. I ran out of time and made lots of silly mistakes. In the majority of my journal entries, itís honestly always these small problems that bring me down. When I focus on one weakness, I neglect the others and so I suffer. Itís just bad mark after bad mark after another and nothingís changing. Iím not improving and itís just this endless cycle of work > complete sac with immense regret > feel sad > get mark and feel even more sad > try and improve > results in a bad mark yet again > tries again > fails > tries again > fails. It's Methods all over again.
Exam countdown: 97 days

Unis
Spoiler
So, Iíve registered for VTAC, SATAC and UAC so far and Iíve put down the preferences for Medicine in all the unis that offer it.

Other Stuff
Iíve also been walking at around 12 pm when itís very sunny and itís so beautiful outside with all the greenery and fresh air! I donít have many synchronous classes either so it sort of feels like holidays for me.
Also, I really need to cut down on my netflix/youtube time so that I can spend more time on my subjects, especially with exams fast approaching. Like, I literally watch 4 hours a day and half the time, Iím not even enjoying it.  I canít let my ATAR suffer as well as my UCAT and so Iím going to try as hard as I possibly can because judging by my scores so far, this yearís going terribly and not how I wanted it to at all. I had so many high expectations that are now dwindling down into failure and I know I keep saying this but I really hope I can pull through. Iíve also been binge-watching ATAR Reaction videos recently and Iíve been thinking about how I want to be feeling on the day of the ATAR. On that day, at 7 am, or whatever time I open them, I want to be able to believe that I did enough work this year to achieve the ATAR I want. When I see that number, I want it to reflect all the potential that I had shown throughout the year. On a more happy note, I think I might film one of those ATAR reaction videos for the lols. 😄

Random
I had a dream I met the whole VCE Journal gang in real life, lol and it was so vivid. 😂
« Last Edit: August 14, 2020, 10:11:31 am by Evolio »
2019: Biology [41], Mathematical Methods [38]
2020: Literature, Psychology, Specialist Mathematics, Chemistry

homeworkisapotato

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Re: Evolio's VCE Journey
« Reply #293 on: August 14, 2020, 10:44:31 am »
+3
Hey Evolio! It sucks that you're upset with your marks but your optimistic attitude to keep trying is very inspiring! It's great that you're taking time off to stop and smell the roses outside as I feel that many don't do it enough. Which AN users did you meet in your dream?
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Evolio

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Re: Evolio's VCE Journey
« Reply #294 on: August 14, 2020, 11:51:14 am »
+3
Hey Evolio! It sucks that you're upset with your marks but your optimistic attitude to keep trying is very inspiring! It's great that you're taking time off to stop and smell the roses outside as I feel that many don't do it enough. Which AN users did you meet in your dream?
Yes, it makes me so happy when it's bright and sunny outside! Unlike today where it's very grey and gloomy .  :'(
Haha, honestly it was such a blur. I remember seeing a big group of people with unfamiliar faces and the thought of seeing you guys but it was highly inaccurate since I don't really know what any of you look like in real life, lol.
2019: Biology [41], Mathematical Methods [38]
2020: Literature, Psychology, Specialist Mathematics, Chemistry

ArtyDreams

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Re: Evolio's VCE Journey
« Reply #295 on: August 14, 2020, 12:31:22 pm »
+3
Hi Evolio - it was awesome to see an update ~ I love reading them!

Quote
WHY? Our SACís in Term 4 lol so a long way away but Iím so close to finishing the course! I literally have a chapter and a bit to do and Iíve finished the entire thing! So excited, but at the same time, very anxious because itíd be time to smash out some practice questions.
I feel you! I'm actually so surprised that we've nearly finished spec (I only have the last chapter to go) and its so reliving! I'm so glad they took off probability ahaha. Spec is such a drainer and I totally feel your pain! Keep at it and I'm sure you'll reach your goals.

Quote
Iíve also been binge-watching ATAR Reaction videos recently and Iíve been thinking about how I want to be feeling on the day of the ATAR. On that day, at 7 am, or whatever time I open them, I want to be able to believe that I did enough work this year to achieve the ATAR I want. When I see that number, I want it to reflect all the potential that I had shown throughout the year. On a more happy note, I think I might film one of those ATAR reaction videos for the lols.
Yessssss by far some of my favourite videos to watch! hey can be so motivating  :D

Quote
I had a dream I met the whole VCE Journal gang in real life, lol and it was so vivid. 😂
I loveeeeeee this ah ha. AN journal gang is the BEST!!!  ;)

Thanks for the update Evolio and I hope you have an awesome weekend!

P.S. Why are exams SO SOON??
the world is too heavy to carry alone.

VCE Class of 2020 

My Short Guide to Mathematical Methods
Study Motivation Tips

Evolio

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Re: Evolio's VCE Journey
« Reply #296 on: September 02, 2020, 03:41:16 pm »
+5
Arty
Hi Evolio - it was awesome to see an update ~ I love reading them!
I feel you! I'm actually so surprised that we've nearly finished spec (I only have the last chapter to go) and its so reliving! I'm so glad they took off probability ahaha. Spec is such a drainer and I totally feel your pain! Keep at it and I'm sure you'll reach your goals.
Yessssss by far some of my favourite videos to watch! hey can be so motivating  :D
I loveeeeeee this ah ha. AN journal gang is the BEST!!!  ;)

Thanks for the update Evolio and I hope you have an awesome weekend!

P.S. Why are exams SO SOON??
Hey Arty! Yes, it's such a relief to have finished spec! Can't wait to start doing practice exam questions!
Haha, as you can tell, I have really weird dreams and they're just getting weirder if I'm being honest.
I know right! Exams are coming up so much faster than I had imagined.  :-\ Time to get down to business

Hey everyone! Long time no see, hey. (I literally just finished my chem sac, lol)

Psychology
Iíve finally finished all the content! I can start pumping out practice exams now, which is a relief. Iím still planning how Iíll go about it because last year, with Biology, as soon as we finished our SACS, I literally just spammed practice questions like a crazy person, doing as much as I could. I thought I was reflecting deeply when correcting and reviewing answers, but that was obviously not true. I canít make the same mistake again. I have a rough plan but I should draw up a timetable so I'm more organised and have a clear path, rather than randomly doing exams when I have the time.
GAME PLAN
- Read over notes for problem areas
- Understand the nuances + things I donít understand (esp research methods)
- Begin early VCAA papers
- Donít immediately correct the exam but rather leave it for later in the day or even the next day.
- Take your time correcting because this is THE most important part.
- Self-correct 10-markers. Then, send to my teacher for additional feedback.

Specialist Mathematics
Iíve finished all the content! We still have one more sac to go and thatís in Term 4 so it feels like eons away. I need to pull up my ranking this one to maximise my chances of getting a decent score. Iíve done a 2019 Heffernan exam and I got alright, surprisingly, but it took me ages to do, like an hour and a half when I should only be taking 40 mins. I need to be both time efficient + accurate.

Literature
We had our sac on Monday and it went alright but I hated how it dragged on for 3 hours. Also, I chucked in irrelevant ideas so I'm worrying about how it might bring down my mark. This is the subject thatís worrying me the most for exams because weíve never had REAL sacs where we only use our brains, rather than our notes. In the real exam, we wonít have that luxury and so Iíve really got to start practising writing paragraphs (doesnít even have to be full essays to start) with paper and pen. Iím in awe of people who write so beautifully and meaningfully in timed conditions, all while maintaining nice expression and ideas. And then thereís me who writes like a 5 year old, finishing 2 paragraphs tops in the time limit. Gotta practise that. Also, Iíve rekindled my passion for lit after writing the Othello essay. Weíre back to Ariel now, which is fantastic, because I love closely analysing and some of the topics explored are really abstract and fascinating. My study score goal for this subject might have increased a bit due to my decent sac marks so letís see where this goes. Iíve just got to work really hard.

Chemistry
My sac went alright. It was on Google Forms and it was giving me so much anxiety because if we didn't submit at the right time, our work would be LOST. Like, imagine getting a 0 for the sac just because you submitted a second later.  :o The joys of online sacs. This is the only subject that we havenít finished content for which sucks because thereís still quite a bit to go. Plus, itís the spectroscopy stuff as well which is soo boring and not as straightforward as the Food Chemistry unit. Iíll be starting practice exams though anyway because thereís not much time left.
GAME PLAN
- Finish the course
- On the 3/4 chem website, trawl through topics you have trouble with and attempt and correct those questions
- Ask teacher any questions you have
- Early VCAA papers
- Make mindmaps to link concepts together
Raw thoughts
My UCAT is at the most, about 86th percentile. When I realised that 2920 was the 90th percentile, I collapsed. That was the worst feeling in the world. I was well below that, not even a little bit, but like by 50 which didnít help matters. I have a next to impossible chance of getting Monash Med and Iíve sort of accepted defeat even though I shouldnít (plus, Iím being a hypocrite). Thatís the golden career for me, while everything else Iím interested in has no career options or they donít exist as careers. If I get Med, Iím set but that doesnít seem like itís happening. Iím still trying for my ATAR because thereís no point ignoring it and giving up but there are only about 230 spots and so many people are going for med and there are much better candidates than me. There are many people who have scored above 3000. There are many people who are on their way to getting >99.5 ATARs. There are many people who have a next to certain chance of getting in. The worst part is that I know I could have done better. My goals are all shattered. Outside, Iím still the person whoís saying Ďyes, I can do this. Never give up. Keep going. Keep trying.í Inside, Iím a collapsed being who is being swallowed by intense regret, depression, emptiness. My chances are gone. Even if I go through Biomed, the chances of getting Graduate Medicine are even lower and I canít really imagine myself passing the interview. And with that Biomed degree, the career options arenít really something Iím interested in. It doesnít seem as exhilarating as what Iíd learn in Medicine. I feel so down and right now, Iím like a robot whoís mindlessly aiming for a 99+ ATAR, which doesnít even seem possible right now. There are things that make me hopeful in achieving that, such as how I am a part of a strong cohort and especially with the sciences, I think Iím in a good place to achieve 45+ but then again, thatís just speculation and everything I hope for never comes true. I know you need to focus on things you can change rather than things you canít but I feel so behind compared to everyone else who seems so ahead. I donít want to end up going into a career that I donít feel fulfilled by. I mean, this is the rest of my life weíre talking about. (Wow, Iím sweating and my heartís beating fast as Iím writing this).
2019: Biology [41], Mathematical Methods [38]
2020: Literature, Psychology, Specialist Mathematics, Chemistry

Bri MT

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Re: Evolio's VCE Journey
« Reply #297 on: September 02, 2020, 04:34:58 pm »
+9
Hey Evolio!

I'm jumping in between uni meetings so I don't have long to write but I can see you beating yourself up because you're not confident you'll score in the top 0.5 % of the state in the VCE system and with your UCAT score you think you're around top 15%. VCE does this hyper-weird thing where it's easy to convince yourself that you're not enough and that you're doing poorly when the numbers are telling you you're doing far better than average. It's twisted. I know med is hyper-competitive and I know that these numbers do mean something for your goals and the options you have at the end of the year but there is nothing they say about you being unworthy or undeserving. I know it's a lot easier for me to write it out than it is for you to believe it but I promise you that these numbers aren't as big and important later on as they seem now. I don't know how many other options you have for med - interstate applications maybe? I'm sure there's threads on this somewhere and people more able to help you with that than me but one thing I really want to highlight here is this:

In continuing to push and try despite your doubts and the feelings of hopelessness you are showing incredible resilience. You know from psych about that being useful, and that's something no number can take away from you. You've got an amazing trait there, you've got a kind and generous heart that I see in how you help others and interact with them here, and you have determination and passion and belief. These things are important and valuable and they say so much more about you than these test results.

It's normal to feel these terrible emotions and to doubt everything but I don't doubt that you have strong potential for your future - however the rest of your VCE pans out. There are many roads to many destinations; I do not believe that year 12 was the most important year in my life or that it will be the most important year in yours.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us and thank you for the psych help I see you giving others. Good luck for your chem sac

David Miot

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Re: Evolio's VCE Journey
« Reply #298 on: September 02, 2020, 04:35:37 pm »
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angrybiscuit

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Re: Evolio's VCE Journey
« Reply #299 on: September 02, 2020, 05:20:17 pm »
+7
you take everything so serious. just do ur best and not be defined by a number. so sad society has become this
I think Evolio has every right to feel disappointed (though they shouldn't be because the score they achieved is amazing nonetheless :)). It is absolutely normal to be disappointed when we do not achieve as highly as one wants and we shouldn't judge that. But please, do not go commenting that they "take everything so serious," as disappointment is normal.




It is far from over, your goals are far from "shattered" and your chances are far from "gone." You have one thing that most people don't and it's that passion and I swear to you that thing will get you through. If it helps, the interview matters too and I know a number of people from Monash who got in with UCAT scores of mid 80s. I know it probably won't help to give you a comparison of some sort but I hope it gives you some peace of mind that it's not over.

Congrats on everything you've achieved thus far. Keep your chin up and keep going, keep remembering the goal that you have in mind and let that propel you forward rather than drag you back. :)
somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.
carl sagan