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Samueliscool223

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Rate This Essay Pls
« on: February 22, 2020, 09:52:48 pm »
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So my first SAC for Unit 1 Literature on a short story called ''Hills Like White Elephants'', which is in 2 days. My teacher suggested that we write practice essays to prepare for the SAC, this is what I wrote in about 1.5 hours. Can you guys give it a letter grade based on fluency, coherence, structure, etc. and provide constructive criticism? Thanks  8)

The American uses his underlying dominance in terms of intellectual and linguistic ability, in order to manipulate Jig’s decisions and perceptions regarding the abortion. The American’s empowering position within the relationship is accentuated through his ability, and Jigs lack of ability, to communicate with the native speaking Spanish people: the audience is positioned to perceive The American as a dominant figure within the relationship, through his control of the drinks that are ordered as well as the translations he provides to Jig in order for her to comprehend what is happening, surrounding her. Jig’s eventual agreeance of going through with the ‘‘operation’’ is dictated by The American’s overarching power he uses to convince Jig the abortion is ‘’the best thing to do’’, and portraying the operation as ‘’perfectly natural’’: this further highlights The American’s underlying manipulative tendencies, which serves as a message to the audience to be weary of those surrounding them and the manipulative tactics some may use.
The substantial power dynamic between the two elicits feelings of inadequacy within Jig, that in turn, significantly impairing her emotional state. Jig’s desire for intellectual validation is exemplified by her asking, regarding an observation she made, ‘’wasn’t that bright?’’, followed by The American’s assurance that what she said ‘’was bright’’ – this statement is implicit of Jig’s perpetual need of reassurance that she is not perceived as inferior to The American, who is previously established as culturally developed and educated individual (on the basis of his ability to speak Spanish and knowledge of alcohol). Additionally, the bar tender, who is referred to as the woman, serves as an emblematic figure of Jig’s general uncertain nature, and her implicitly self-perceived inadequacy, as the woman’s dialogue consists of questions and confirming of the couple’s drink orders, representative of Jig’s need for corroboration regarding her non-inferior cognition. Hemingway demonstrates the adverse effects of one holding superior power and influence within a relationship, and details the emotional strains that results in such behaviour.
Hemingway depicts the deleterious strains such a power imbalance, as displayed within the story, can have on relationships. The dialogue between Jig and The American is primarily characterized by tempestuous arguments, evident by the sharp remarks the girl makes such as ‘’no we can’t [have everything]’’ and ‘’can’t we maybe stop talking?’’ These tensive remarks stem from The American’s overall dominance in the conversations between the two, with him frequently attempting to alter her mind about the pregnancy, and his assertion of his own views of the issue that contradict Jig’s ‘’unreason[able]’’ ones. The gradually increasing tension and divide between Jig and The American is encapsulated by the symbolically juxtaposed setting: the barren and dry landscape on one side and the lush and green landscape on the other signifies the growing division between the two, due to their differing amounts of power in the relationship.
Jig’s assumption that ‘’[life] will be nice again’’ following the procedure reflects her naïve nature and her susceptibility to the American’s manipulative practices. She is depicted as an individual seeking primarily to please him, placing his preferences and interests before hers. Jig ultimately submits to his controlling propensities and goes through with the abortion as he wishes, due to her lack of ‘’care about [her]self’’, her desperate attempts to keep the relationship intact and to still ‘’have everything’’, as well as his persuasive techniques, with him stating that the abortion process ‘’is perfectly simple’’ and is ‘’perfectly natural’’. Her compliance with the operation is solely in service of her attempting to satisfy the desires of The American; and is not necessarily within her own interests. Hemingway emphasises the ramifications an imbalance of power can have within a relationship, and how the wrong decisions can be made as a result.