Frankenstein essay- feedback needed.

[afnan900]

Hi guys,
I've attached my Frankenstein essay to this post.
The prompt is: Shelley encourages the reader to feel sympathy for the creature throughout the novel. Discuss.
Feedback would be very much appreciated!
Thank you

[OZLexico]

Hi, I have attached a copy of your essay with some comments on it so I hope that will be helpful. Also your work has a few short, single terms quoted - assessors don't like this and quotes should be 4-6 words in length, so you should definitely work on improving this.  As your topic is about the Creature, he should be more prominent in your topic sentences, rather than Victor. I think you should also make sure you are actually responding fully to the essay topic as the wording can be quite subtle.

[afnan900]

Hi, I have attached a copy of your essay with some comments on it so I hope that will be helpful. Also your work has a few short, single terms quoted - assessors don't like this and quotes should be 4-6 words in length, so you should definitely work on improving this.  As your topic is about the Creature, he should be more prominent in your topic sentences, rather than Victor. I think you should also make sure you are actually responding fully to the essay topic as the wording can be quite subtle.

Thank you so much for your insightful feedback!