Respecting teachers

[JR_StudyEd]

How do I show some more respect for my schoolteachers? How can I improve my relationship with them? How can I ensure that they are able to help me as much as possible?

[Joseph41]

Do you feel as though you've been disrespecting them?

[sophiefarinacci]

As a tutor myself, I believe that one of the key - and easiest! - ways to show that you respect and appreciate your teachers is to be engaged in their lessons. They have a tough job, and it is your participation that indicates to them how they are doing; answer their questions, say a smiley and sincere 'thank you' after class, don't sit on your phone/device during the lesson, and ask questions yourself.
If you demonstrate your enthusiasm and readiness to learn, and your commitment in your studies, hopefully they will respond with similar enthusiasm when you ask for their help.

[JR_StudyEd]

Do you feel as though you've been disrespecting them?

I have a somewhat difficult relationship with my Methods teacher, in that I find it hard to discuss anything with him. The most articulate way I can describe it is that he's not very approachable. Just then, I received an email from the school counsellor that she wants to meet me regarding my teacher. I'm scared to find out what it is about. I do suspect that it will be about what I've just mentioned.

Yesterday, when I asked him a question, he didn't seem very enthused to talk to me, although he did answer. That really baffled me. And overall, it's been a rocky sort of relationship. I don't have anything against him, but I do want to show him some more respect.

[Joseph41]

I have a somewhat difficult relationship with my Methods teacher, in that I find it hard to discuss anything with him. The most articulate way I can describe it is that he's not very approachable. Just then, I received an email from the school counsellor that she wants to meet me regarding my teacher. I'm scared to find out what it is about. I do suspect that it will be about what I've just mentioned.

Yesterday, when I asked him a question, he didn't seem very enthused to talk to me, although he did answer. That really baffled me. And overall, it's been a rocky sort of relationship. I don't have anything against him, but I do want to show him some more respect.

I guess enthusiasm isn't necessarily part of the job description. Re: showing respect, I like what sophiefarinacci said above. A genuine "thank you" after class, simply paying attention - honestly, I think the small things really do make a massive difference.

Keep us updated on how the situation progresses if you're keen.

[mango8]

Teachers are some of the most amazing, hard-working, wonderful people in the world, and reserve more recognition and appreciation for everything they do, because so much of the time, unfortunately they are under appreciated, under valued and seriously taken for granted for.

Show your teachers how much you appreciate them and what they do for you rather than having that mentality that this is their job and all your job is to sit there passively and never interact or respond to them outside of that one hour block. In the lesson itself, ask questions, pay full attention (don’t scroll through your phone or laptop in front of their face) and show your willingness and eagerness to learn. Put in every effort to do well in their class, talk to them, they are human too, and they are not just there to be your slave for that portion of the day like so many people seem to think so.

So a little anecdote for you:
In fact, there’s this really stupid girl I’ve had in my classes, who has not changed whatsoever and is the epitome of a student you do not want to be like at all. The only question she ever asked the teacher is: "Can I go to the toilet?"

This is not a joke, her only interactions with the teacher have only ever been that, and I had a class with her in a few years ago and some now, and she’s still the same ungrateful little brat. A couple of years ago, she used to literally watch The Bachelorette or some other reality show every single class, right when the teacher was teaching!! This is high school not primary school and she is that immature and rude. That behaviour absolutely disgusts me. Can you even imagine how the teachers would have felt?

Always say thank-you after class, smile at them in the hallways, have conversations about the class and even just strike up a normal conversation about mundane things. Try your best in their class, and may I stress this doesn’t mean you need to be getting full marks all the time or be the smartest in the class, no, just put in all your effort and show you care about what you’re learning and who they are and how they are bettering your learning and teaching you valuable life lessons too.

And little things, at the end of the year maybe give them a card or write them a letter thanking them for everything. You want to show them you truly appreciate and value all they do rather than being ungrateful and take it all for granted (like a lot of students which is really sad).

Teachers are beautiful souls who deserve our respect and appreciation, just take out a little time and put in your effort to do that, and they will appreciate that more than you'll ever know.

You can only try your best to have a good relationship with him. They’re often very busy at the end of the year, and may not want to mark 100 practice exams. So be specific with your questions  and always be kind and thoughtful towards them. Teachers are basically your most valuable resource. Instead of fighting them, work with them, they are after all, on your side.

Hope all goes well John! Things may be going on in his personal life, and as Natasha said, maybe he just isn’t comfortable with emotion, and you have to accept that and work with him to the best of your abilities.

[JR_StudyEd]

UPDATE: I just finished my first Methods SAC, and I would like to comment on a few things about my teacher that just baffle me.

I really persistently try and ask him questions, but in expressing my increasingly worsening anxiety in the days leading up to the SAC, he just said 'don't panic'. Not very helpful and it did nothing to relieve or reassure me. He then asked me, 'Have you got any maths-related questions?', which sent a message to me that he cares mainly about the Maths side of things, and not the mental strain that preparing for and doing such an intensive SAC has put on me. He did say that he understands how stressful it is, but didn't expand more into the psychological realm than that. During the SAC, I floundered. It got worse and worse as time went by. Now I'm terrified to approach him, lest he heavily criticises me for completely screwing up.

[Bri MT]

UPDATE: I just finished my first Methods SAC, and I would like to comment on a few things about my teacher that just baffle me.

I really persistently try and ask him questions, but in expressing my increasingly worsening anxiety in the days leading up to the SAC, he just said 'don't panic'. Not very helpful and it did nothing to relieve or reassure me. He then asked me, 'Have you got any maths-related questions?', which sent a message to me that he cares mainly about the Maths side of things, and not the mental strain that preparing for and doing such an intensive SAC has put on me. He did say that he understands how stressful it is, but didn't expand more into the psychological realm than that. During the SAC, I floundered. It got worse and worse as time went by. Now I'm terrified to approach him, lest he heavily criticises me for completely screwing up.

I suspect that your teacher may feel ill-equipped to help you with stress & anxiety coping strategies and see this more as a school counsellor's role (despite the methods SAC being a stressor for you) / I think that he does actually care but doesn't know how to help you aside from addressing any math questions you have and helping you learn + apply the content.


I'm sorry to hear that you've continued to face difficulties in maintaining an effective headspace during your SACs :/ Hopefully this will dissipate as you grow more used to SAC conditions (inc practices) and if you gain more confidence in methods.

I can't remember if you have already made a thread for this but hopefully if you do/did you can gain some helpful advice on math stress from the AN community

[Aaron]

Just from the perspective of an actual teacher.... you have to understand that if a teacher didn't care, they wouldn't be in the role. It's as simple as that. Some teachers are full of energy and can easily express emotion and others, well, can't. I think understanding that teachers even though they are seen as an 'us vs them', they are still human and are different people. You won't get two teachers that are the exact same, ever. I think the comment about underappreciation etc. is very true as well. Our profession at the moment is seen by many in the wrong way given the significant importance of what we do - if you break it down to the core point, we're essentially looking after and bringing up kids on the parents' behalf for a crap salary and constant abuse/disrespect/lack of appreciation. The salary alone imo would drive anybody who doesn't genuinely want to be there, away. I can't count the amount of times i've had disrespect towards me - people find it very easy to pick on the little things wrong, but don't celebrate and recognise the wins (big or small)

I behave very differently in a Year 7 Maths class as opposed to a Year 8 or 9 Digital Technology subject, primarily based on the cohort and the subject discipline. One is very structured and straight to the point, and the other is so broad I have to be able to think on my feet and get creative.

I honestly think (and I really hope this doesn't come across in the wrong way) that you need to speak to somebody at your school (other than this teacher about your thoughts). You have been commenting about teachers etc. on here for a bit now and I say this with the greatest of respect, nobody here can resolve these outstanding issues for you. Even if you let your parents know and get them to advocate on your behalf, it is better than leaving it and hoping for it to just resolve itself (which it most likely won't).

Btw about the 'dont panic' comment - your teacher is commenting within the bounds of what they are qualified to say. Sure it'd be fantastic if they had some study/revision strategies to help, but coping mechanisms for anxiety etc. definitely go outside the bounds of a classroom teacher's expertise so it's unrealistic to expect all teachers to be able to do this. I'd actually be going to wellbeing in your school or your coordinator as they'll be able to direct you to the best supports. It is a challenging position teachers are in - because of the whole "duty of care" and tiptoeing around. What we say and do can have a massive impact (potentially in a negative way), so for fear of negative consequences, some teachers are comfortable just commenting on things they know they can comment on, rather than trying to guess what's wrong and hoping it was the right thing to say/do.

I know I follow the rule where if i'm not qualified to comment on it, I won't. I'm sure many other teachers are the same for fear of potential repercussions.

Just another thing as well and I know this is irrelevant and different to your situation: I work my absolute ass off behind the scenes in particular for all of my students and whenever something very minor goes wrong, i'll have parent phone calls/emails on the day or the day after telling me about it. But how many people do you think I get contact from when something goes really well instead? If you guessed zero, you're absolutely right. I often feel undervalued and underappreciated and it's not from the teachers or management. It's the students and parents. Just another story for consideration. I would love to have a parent or student come to me and say 'thank you for doing this' or even something like 'we recognise the work you do'.. words can make so much of a difference. I think the previous posts sum it up pretty well about how to show appreciation and respect. Little things.

[brothanathan]

Just from the perspective of an actual teacher.... you have to understand that if a teacher didn't care, they wouldn't be in the role. It's as simple as that. Some teachers are full of energy and can easily express emotion and others, well, can't. I think understanding that teachers even though they are seen as an 'us vs them', they are still human and are different people. You won't get two teachers that are the exact same, ever. I think the comment about underappreciation etc. is very true as well. Our profession at the moment is seen by many in the wrong way given the significant importance of what we do - if you break it down to the core point, we're essentially looking after and bringing up kids on the parents' behalf for a crap salary and constant abuse/disrespect/lack of appreciation. The salary alone imo would drive anybody who doesn't genuinely want to be there, away. I can't count the amount of times i've had disrespect towards me - people find it very easy to pick on the little things wrong, but don't celebrate and recognise the wins (big or small)

I behave very differently in a Year 7 Maths class as opposed to a Year 8 or 9 Digital Technology subject, primarily based on the cohort and the subject discipline. One is very structured and straight to the point, and the other is so broad I have to be able to think on my feet and get creative.

I honestly think (and I really hope this doesn't come across in the wrong way) that you need to speak to somebody at your school (other than this teacher about your thoughts). You have been commenting about teachers etc. on here for a bit now and I say this with the greatest of respect, nobody here can resolve these outstanding issues for you. Even if you let your parents know and get them to advocate on your behalf, it is better than leaving it and hoping for it to just resolve itself (which it most likely won't).

Btw about the 'dont panic' comment - your teacher is commenting within the bounds of what they are qualified to say. Sure it'd be fantastic if they had some study/revision strategies to help, but coping mechanisms for anxiety etc. definitely go outside the bounds of a classroom teacher's expertise so it's unrealistic to expect all teachers to be able to do this. I'd actually be going to wellbeing in your school or your coordinator as they'll be able to direct you to the best supports. It is a challenging position teachers are in - because of the whole "duty of care" and tiptoeing around. What we say and do can have a massive impact (potentially in a negative way), so for fear of negative consequences, some teachers are comfortable just commenting on things they know they can comment on, rather than trying to guess what's wrong and hoping it was the right thing to say/do.

I know I follow the rule where if i'm not qualified to comment on it, I won't. I'm sure many other teachers are the same for fear of potential repercussions.

Just another thing as well and I know this is irrelevant and different to your situation: I work my absolute ass off behind the scenes in particular for all of my students and whenever something very minor goes wrong, i'll have parent phone calls/emails on the day or the day after telling me about it. But how many people do you think I get contact from when something goes really well instead? If you guessed zero, you're absolutely right. I often feel undervalued and underappreciated and it's not from the teachers or management. It's the students and parents. Just another story for consideration. I would love to have a parent or student come to me and say 'thank you for doing this' or even something like 'we recognise the work you do'.. words can make so much of a difference. I think the previous posts sum it up pretty well about how to show appreciation and respect. Little things.

If only all teachers had the passion to nurture students :/

[JR_StudyEd]

With all due respect to teachers, I have the following questions:

- Is it a teacher's responsibility to motivate their students? What if your teacher just tells you what to do? What if they don't really encourage you? I know we're beginning to be self-motivated, but is it part of their job description to get their students interested in what they're interested in too? (Otherwise why would a teacher be teaching that subject?)
- Are teachers at least partially responsible for how well a student does in tests and assignments? Saying that the teacher is fully responsible for a student's success or failure is not only disrespectful, but simply untrue imo.

[hums_student]

Just my 2 cents: I think it's definitely helpful to have a teacher who cares about your wellbeing and other non-academic factors, who motivates you to do your very best. Students no doubt are more likely to do well when they have a teacher who they can talk to. As someone who's hoping to go into teaching in the future, my goal is to become someone who motivates students rather than just cram textbooks and facts down their throats.

But - it's also important to remember that a teacher-student relationship goes both ways. Yeah sure, it sucks when teachers don't seem to care, but have you shown any respect towards them to begin with? Teachers get enough crap from students and parents as it is (as Aaron already pointed out), so are you making their job easier, or even harder?

Personal anecdote

Back in year 11-12, my literature teacher absolutely hated my guts and did everything in his power to kick me out of this class, marked me harsher than the rest, telling me he "had no time" when I sent him essays, giving me rank 2 even though I had the best SAC marks -- pretended that I didn't exist for a good year and a half. Naturally, I hated him back, showed him zero respect, skipped his classes, blamed him when I did badly etc. But then I decided to try be respectful towards him - and the change was drastic. He started taking time out of his day to help me, sending me extra resources, and really motivated me to do well. In hindsight, I was the one being a dick to him, and I do not blame him one bit for being one back to me.

So returning to your question, I think you should 100% always, always be respectful towards teachers. If they don't seem to care, ask yourself: are you behaving in a way that makes them want to care about your wellbeing? Do you say 'thank you' to your teacher at the end of every class or do you rush out as soon as the bell rings? Do you smile and greet them when you see them walking towards you in the hallway or do you avoid eye contact? Do you acknowledge the fact that you're taking time out of their day when you approach them with questions or do you demand their attention? Do you show them that you appreciate the efforts they put into each class or do you just brush it off saying 'it's their job'? 

Chances are, once you change your attitude towards your teachers, their attitude towards you will also change.