VIDEO
Song of the journal update! (Inspired by Ashmi!)
This song represents the internal mental conflict experienced by Mary and her experience with the dualistic struggle between determination motivated by extrinsic means and pessimistic outlook. In this essay I will
Look, I honestly don't really know what else to say at this point. I'm typing this during my Accounting blocking so again, I think this is a huge mutual time waster for you, whoever is reading this and myself. If you're not prepared to to read about my ramblings then I suggest you turn back and head off somewhere else where time is better spent. When I was in year 11, My goal for VCE was to get an ATAR of at least a 95+
Spoiler
🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡 Yeahh this isn't happening. I don't know if it's the lockdown or if I've overestimated my ability to succeed but I'm definitely not satisfied with the way school is going for me and how I feel like such a massive failure
If you've even bothered to read past this point, thank you. Really. I mean it. Sincerely. Now let's nosedive into my subjects.
ENGLISH hmmmm English. English. There's no choice but to 'do well' in this subject. Am I meeting that criteria of 'doing well'? Nope. Am I trying as hard as I should? Nope. Am I writing essays? If that means one paragraph a week and half
assing an essay a week, YEAH! My school has been speed running through the comparative for
I Am Malala and the film
Pride . Random tangent but I just find it so irritating when I hand in an essay for my teachers to mark and then she's like 'oh yeah definitely look forward to reading this!' and then I get it back two weeks later like 😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐 Im not trying to start beef with her (hope nobody here rcognises which school I go to... yikes) but honestly can you just please mark my work please I just need feedback. Considering English is my weakest subject, this is really concerning. I don't know if my school is just trash in general but the text response took the whole english cohort two months to mark. In that period of two months, I was able to finish the entire chem textbook (oh wait I still have to revise this subject. More on that later), vacuum the house from top to bottom, exercise (a rarity) and change my phone wallpaper. If you're wondering how I went on that text response essay for Extinction, I lost four marks. I'm not going to delve any further because English marks make my head spin but I will move on now and discuss my bipolar relationship with chem.
Spoiler
Hey, before you tell me to empathise with teachers because they are busy human beings, I get that. But just please mark my essay. I feel like this never-ending cycle of my teaching refusing to mark my essay turns onto me and makes me demotivated to write more essays because I know that they will never be marked... and I will never improve in this subject
Chem Ohhh chem. I realised that chemistry is another subject that I will just have to do well in because I will need it as a prereq (more on my course prefs later). My teacher finished the course two months ago (yep) and now I've realised that half of the u3 content has fallen out of my head. It's so annoying when you learn something quickly and you get it but then it doesnt consolidate properly and then you forget it later and then you come to learn it again and then your other subjects become weaker because you've neglected them for the sake of chemistry... I have a remote sac for chem later this week on food chem and I feel so underprepared I feel like I'm going to fail this sac. My days pretty much consist of me walking around the house chanting, 'OXYGEN IS ALWAYS THE OXIDANT in a fuel cell'.
Accounting:
This is definitely a bottom 2 subject. I put zero effort into this subject. Good news is that I haven't failed a sac and I'm hovering in a 'good percentile' to get at least 30+ ss. My class is currently learning about the DU PONT method of ratio analysis and comparing analysis techniques, return on assets, liquidity...
Methods:
I don't know why but it takes me like two hours to finish methods homework every night. At this rate, it will probably take me a day to finish exam 1. Sometimes, I just don't have time to finish everything so I cram everything for the weekends and thus, go on an entire maths methods marathon on sunday afternoon till sunday night finishing unfisnished chapters, worksheets, google classroom stuff. I wanted to vomit when I started doing the past exam questions. They require such a sophisticated level of thinking instead of the 'ready to eat meals' you get in the textbook. My teacher doesn't follow the textbook and instead prints us worksheets full of notes and past exam questions and booklets she expects completed every night. We just finished confidence intervals last thursday so now exam revision is awaiting. I hate disappointing my methods teacher. She works so hard to give us extra worksheets, stuff to revise and yet I'm still here finishing a booklet on sampling from last week.
On a more positive note, I hope that I am able to get into something related to health science/pharmacy/ pharmacy science. My number one goal and dream is to work in pharmacy. I've always thought that being a pharmacist is cool because you get to interact with members of the community and learn about drugs but then I realised there was this huge issue about the chemist warehouse monopoly... So then I decided if I were to graduate with a degree, I might as well work in hospital pharm. Sometimes when I feel hopeless, I remind myself how grateful I am to be able to attend school and how education is so valuable. In fact, education isn't just about learning cool shizz in science class and how lipids are formed... it helps you achieve social mobility and how to make a living for yourself. Although we need to sacrifice our personal time and money to achieve great marks, our education is so valuable to us. I didn't realise how privileged I am, after reading Yousafzai's memoir. A very eye opening read to say the least.
Mary
Home
Help
Search
Login
Poll
Topic: Marylen's VCE Journey (Read 11543 times)