Hello everyone,
I'm going into my final year of schooling next year (Class of 2019) and I thought it'd be a great idea to start something to track my progress and general feelings about everything. It being public's a nice bonus too, might help me with procrastination ;)
A bit of background in case you've never seen me before (I've only posted a handful of times):
Spoiler
I'm Zappi! I'm going into Year 12 in 2019. I live in the western suburbs of Melbourne, where I've lived for most of my life. I have a passion for language, linguistics and communication in general, which I hope to do as a career ;D
I've studied Japanese for around 2~3 years by myself and I've gotten to an intermediate stage, passing the JLPT N3 in 2017 and taking the N2 in 2018. I've also dabbled in a lot of other languages, like Malay / Indonesian (beginner, but I only learn from what I pick up from having conversations), Esperanto / Interlingua, Cantonese and many more (only dabbled, haven't progressed much if at all in any of 'em)
I'm fairly quiet and keep to myself in public (complete opposite at home, just ask my family ;)). Never really been social so I don't really like making myself known. I have a very small group of really close friends and I wouldn't want anything else ;D
So, next year I've chosen to study English Language, VCE Japanese (through Distance Ed w/ VSL), Software Development, BusMan and Further Maths. I'm told it's a good mix so we'll see how it all turns out 8)
My goals seem a bit far fetched to me now, but hopefully I can push through it all.
- English Language - aiming for at least 35 raw. I picked English Language over Mainstream English or Lit because it resonates with me a lot more. I have a passion for linguistics, languages, translation and how languages reflect the society and culture in which it was developed so this was a nobrainer ;D
- VCE Japanese - aiming for at least 42 raw. The main reason I picked this subject is for the scaling, to be honest. I've had around 3 years of self-study and U1&2 was much easier than what I expected. I passed the JLPT N3 last year and took the N2 this December so hopefully Japanese will be easy marks!!
- Software Development - aiming for at least 35 raw. I've had on-and-off experience with programming ever since I started using a computer ;D My main backup for Uni other than linguistics and translation is IT so I thought it'd be pretty valuable :P
- Business Management - aiming for at least 38 raw. Honestly, not much interest in BusMan!! It just clicks with me. I got through U1&2 with an average SAC mark of 92% and my final exam was anywhere from 95% to 100% (teacher forgot the exact mark) so I figured it'd be a good subject to have. Even though I have no plans of ever owning or managing a business it seems like what we learn would still be really helpful in life, even with just being aware of how businesses function (plus my teacher last year was amazing ;D)
- Further Maths - aiming for at least 39 / 40 raw. I've always figured myself to be more of a science-based person so Maths was definitely gonna be one of my subjects. Methods & Spesh looked waay too difficult for me and none of my dream courses even need them so I had no reason to do either. I figure I can do well if I practise practise practise ;D
Overall, my personal goal for my ATAR is 90~95+, with my dream course's (Arts, Linguistics Major @ Melb. Uni) ATAR req. being 85.
Personal junk in the spoiler if anyone wants to read it:
Spoiler
I don't have a real reason to go so high but I have lots of personal reasons for why I am. I've always had a serious lack of self-control which has manifested itself in procrastination, hoarding, self-neglect and even me hurting people that I love and cherish as a result of me not having restraint. It's always been serious, but the major turning point was when it started hurting others, not just myself (not to mention how my family's been affected over the years).
Over the past few months (probably starting around June 2018) I've woken up to how serious it all is and how it goes completely against my personal values and expectations I have for myself and others. 2018 has probably been one of the lowest years of my life, but I'm so so so grateful that people are so incredibly understanding and patient and were / still are willing to walk me through all of this. If I didn't get all of the love and support I've gotten over the past few months I'd probably not be here typing this right now.
I decided that the best course of action would be to organise myself, discipline myself and learn to be a better person, no matter how painful it is. School's just another way I'm trying to do this, as my results have always been so much lower than what I think I'm capable of (test scores have always been good, but it got to the point this / last year that I was handing in work so rarely that I was just minutes away from completely failing Year 10 and Year 11).
I want to do amazingly well in VCE not only to help me get into a good university, but also to prove to myself that I can fix this, that I can push myself and that I can do this. It'll be tough, sure, but I'm sick and tired of making excuses after excuses as to why I'm not doing my absolute best (I even started telling people what I should be doing, not what I'm actually doing, just to trick myself into thinking that I'm okay). I need to show myself that I have the ability to succeed and not let the demons in my head ruin all of it for me.
tl;dr my lack of self-control has hurt myself and others around me, so I finally decided to take action half way through 2018 and prove to myself that I can overcome this. I want to do well in VCE so I can teach myself to have control, discipline and just the drive to do better.
So yeah! I hope to post updates here fairly often to keep myself on track and to share my experiences with others. I really hope we can all do our best this year!!
(I think I've done this right but please call me out if I'm breaking any rules by posting this!! I'm still kinda unsure :'()[/list]
re:spoiler
I'm glad that you're acknowledging the need for change, even though that must be quite confronting for you.
Part of your story reminds me of part of my VCE experience:
For me, during year 9 I was not handing in or completing homework despite the fact that I wished I was & it got to the point where at the end of year 9 my science teacher told me I wouldn't succeed in VCE despite being academically "bright". In year 11 I had that teacher for units 3&4 of VCE biology and achieved a study score of 47.
One thing I think would have benefitted me is talking to a counsellor earlier to have professional support as I worked on my wellbeing (I only started being open when speaking to one during year 12, and it was a better experience than I thought it would be). This might not be something you feel comfortable with yet, but I would recommend it.
Best of luck to you and your family; I believe you can turn things around.
I studied eng lang too (and wanted to study jap at a VCE level but had timetable clashing). Eng lang is one of the best VCE subjects, imo :)
re:spoiler
I'm glad that you're acknowledging the need for change, even though that must be quite confronting for you.
Part of your story reminds me of part of my VCE experience:
For me, during year 9 I was not handing in or completing homework despite the fact that I wished I was & it got to the point where at the end of year 9 my science teacher told me I wouldn't succeed in VCE despite being academically "bright". In year 11 I had that teacher for units 3&4 of VCE biology and achieved a study score of 47.
One thing I think would have benefitted me is talking to a counsellor earlier to have professional support as I worked on my wellbeing (I only started being open when speaking to one during year 12, and it was a better experience than I thought it would be). This might not be something you feel comfortable with yet, but I would recommend it.
Best of luck to you and your family; I believe you can turn things around.
I studied eng lang too (and wanted to study jap at a VCE level but had timetable clashing). Eng lang is one of the best VCE subjects, imo :)
Spoiler
Thank you ;D It means a lot to hear that. I do go to a psychologist but I'm just trying to build up the courage to get this off my chest.
Definitely better for more science-y people. Hated mainstream in Year 10 (watching Romeo + Juliet for the 20th time) even though I did well in it. Always hear that EL is harder than mainstream but it seems to click with me better ;D
21st of December 2018
Living Lingo arrived! Hoping to start reading it & taking notes but I'm still figuring out how to approach it. I have a summaries book and an in-class / scrap book in my EL binder. Should I do practice essays and exercises in the in-class book? Write metalanguage & summaries of topics in my summaries book following SD points? Have no idea and I'm scared to ruin the fresh new book :'(
Spoiler
Thank you ;D It means a lot to hear that. I do go to a psychologist but I'm just trying to build up the courage to get this off my chest.
Definitely better for more science-y people. Hated mainstream in Year 10 (watching Romeo + Juliet for the 20th time) even though I did well in it. Always hear that EL is harder than mainstream but it seems to click with me better ;D
21st of December 2018
Living Lingo arrived! Hoping to start reading it & taking notes but I'm still figuring out how to approach it. I have a summaries book and an in-class / scrap book in my EL binder. Should I do practice essays and exercises in the in-class book? Write metalanguage & summaries of topics in my summaries book following SD points? Have no idea and I'm scared to ruin the fresh new book :'(
Spoiler
No problem at all :) It seems like you've gotten off to a good start and are actively trying to make progress -- that's important and commendable
The year level before mine did Romeo and Juliet but luckily in my year we had Macbeth (I love reading but find romance boring and uninteresting at the best of times).
We've got a metalanguage thread in the eng lang section of the forums which I reckon is pretty good & better than using a book-bound glossary. I'd probably write summaries in the summary book according to the study design and work for the back of the summary book on essays but do in-class exercises in the in-class one. That's just me though.
I think the important thing is, the sooner you start taking an approach, the sooner you'll learn if it works for you or not. If you really don't like how you've started you can always rip out pages (only applies to mistakes in exercise books; I wouldn't desecrate an actual book by even folding a corner, let alone ripping out paper)
I tend to be pretty bad with names myself but for in future here are some tips that are generally helpful:
remembering names
- use the person's name back to them a few times recently after you've heard it.
- learn something about them
- occasionally use their name while talking
- mentally summarise to yourself at the end of the convo
(eg. You: Hey, what's your name btw? Didn't catch it ealier
Them: Oh that's alright, I'm "Them"
You: Them?
Them: Yep!
You: Great! Nice to meet you, Them.
*ask question about them - hopefully something that gives you more info about them than "how are you?" *
Remembering names is a skill you can develop over time - it takes practice but it's certainly not something you always have to struggle with
Year 12 does get more intense as the year progresses but you also get more used to being in year 12, so I'd try not to read too much into feeling pressure now. Who knows - the pressure could even be a sign of motivation to do well and thus be good. :)