The alleged abuses occurring at asylum seeker camps offshore Australia has been a contentious issue
as of late. Greg Trenton weighs in on this issue in his letter to the editor entitled, “This ordinary bloke has finally had enough, contending in a disillusioned and exasperated tone that the deceit conducted by Australian politicians has reached a tipping point and that their failure to address the abuses at camp
will be brought into public consciousness what exactly do you mean by the underlined part?. Trenton mainly adopts
the use of colloquial language and denigration of politicians to persuade everyday Australian citizens
towards his viewpoint nothing wrong with it, but it’s good to make a habit of cutting out anything vague and general like ‘persuades them to agree with his viewpoint’ as they don’t add anything to your analysis.
Really solid intro that ticks off boxes and says everything clearly and concisely. Well done.By establishing himself as an “ordinary bloke” who “[makes] ends meet”, Trenton has provided the reader with a representation of a man who seems familiar to them, therefore making them more inclined to trust his authenticity – as he is acutely aware of the actions of politicians, despite not giving “a rats about politics”
your explanation is clear and really good - could you then expand further? Why does he present himself as someone who doesn't 'give a rats' about politics? It's good and you could get more out of it. By employing the use of colloquial language such as “pollies” and “docs”, Trenton creates a personable tone
noice, but by running multiple impacts together into one sentence, you miss a chance to analyse. Why does he create a personable tone? How is he trying to get the readers to view him through this tone, and why does he want them to view him that way? How does it help persuade them? while simultaneously creating a divide between “ordinary Aussies” and the brazen “pollies” brilliant! now think about how this influences the reader and makes them feel towards the politicians. The divide is further developed by Trenton
by mentioning the criticisms from noble doctors who “leave their cushy well-paid jobs” to aid compared to politicians who stay silent on the issue. This serves to highlight the suffering morality of politicians to the reader, as Trenton attempts to elicit an urgency to address the callousness of the government.
To take this to a higher level (and yes, it’s already really high-quality, but I want you to go further!), expand on the point a bit longer. You don’t have to try and cram analysis of a few phrases into one sentence; take the time to breathe and spread it out over a few sentences. Think about that ‘leave their cushy well-paid jobs’ again. Why does he say that? How is he trying to make the readers view the doctors? How do these words create this feeling? And why does he want them to view the doctors that way? Then, you brilliantly suggested he uses this to contrast with the politicians; so how does that make us feel about the politicians? Do we like or dislike them, respect or despise them? And thus what does that stimulate us to want to think or do? (you’ve answered most of these in very very brief detail, but could expand more over a couple of sentences) Spoiler
‘cushy well-paid jobs’ – aims to make the readers view the doctors as self-sacrificing and noble, so they’ll see their claims as reliable rather than being made up for reasons of self-interest, thus they’ll believe the horrific conditions of the camps. Contrasts with politicians who are presented as selfish, callous and unreliable, so we despise and don’t rely on them and thus believe they’re telling lies.
Trenton’s admission of the allegations going through the “keeper” as he makes “ends meet” serves to eliminate any readers’ predisposition to disregard his claims because of self-righteousness
really great ideas here, well done!. Thus, the reader is more inclined to believe that Trenton is speaking from a place of genuine frustration; evident as he points out the politicians’ self-preservation in his irreverent jibe
nice word towards a government who “can’t comment” because it would “alert the baddies”. Trenton’s mocking tone suggests to the reader the folly over allaying foes instead of prioritising humanitarian concerns
encourages the reader to ridicule etc. Coupled with Trenton’s stance that he is “off to enrol”, he leaves readers with the belief that if current politicians are not capable, they will be able to vote in political changes.
unclear last sentence, I don’t get what you’re trying to say
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