Since the year has pretty much come to an end, I thought it would be nice to wrap up my thoughts on the first part of my journey.
I think the year has been defined by a degree of uncertainty. I, along with many others in my cohort, was thrown into a new city having just finished high school. Being an 18 year old, your level of wisdom and experience is very low, yet from day one when you’re being lectured in the anatomy labs, you know the expectation is that in six years you will become a knowledgeable and respectable professional. Even now, it seems like there is an unbridgeable gap between where I am now and where I must be at the end of my degree, despite all I have learned this year. I think one of the great things about undergrad med is that you get to learn and mature with your cohort, but I can see the appeal of being able to have some experiences before starting med school.
There’s also the ironic juxtaposition or expectations of medical students to act professionally and the reality. Everyone acts so professionally during CBL, clinical skills and medical professionalism tutorials, but when it gets to the weekend it becomes a haze of intoxication and other seedy activities. I’m certainly guilty of indulging in these activities myself and I don’t necessarily believe they are of issue, it just feels strange.
I think mental health also has to be brought up. It honestly feels like most of my friends and people I know suffer from some form of depression or anxiety. I’m not saying that this is an issue exclusive to med school or even university, but I never really realised how prevalent it is, and I definitely feel it is something that needs to be urgently addressed.
Now finally onto exams. I was quite disappointed with my OSCE (Objective Structured Clinical Examination) mark. I’ll admit I’m fairly used to receiving solid enough grades but I knew from the start this would be tough as my strength is definitely written exams. I did plenty of practice on history taking and doing physical exams and I honestly don’t know where I went wrong. In the end I think it might be because I’m a naturally shy person and I didn’t sound confident enough, but I’ll have to find out. It’s definitely shaken me a bit as I’m concerned that I can’t be a good doctor no matter how hard I study because I’m too introverted. Hopefully I can figure out how to improve next year.
On the topic of next year, I’m looking forward to doing an elective relating to neurological diseases in semester 2. It feels good to at least be able to finally choose one subject for myself, and it’s certainly an area I’m particularly interested. I also dabbled in some research in human neurophysiology this year and I’m hoping to expand upon that next year. Not really sure how involved you can get as an undergrad student but I guess I’ll find out.