Hello, I'm partway through a piano composition for the topic of An Instrument and it's Repertoire, just wondering if anyone could take a look and give me any feedback? Here's the youtube link with the audio as well as the score, so if I've made any errors in notating or just a part sounds bad please let me know. Thank you
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XloGWZA85f0
Here are the things that come to mind when I listen and study this composition.
As I progress:
- The trill in the opening seems effective at evoking some kind of suspense, and it resolves down. Complements the arpeggio melody in the bass line well.
- Followed by a whole sequence of arpeggios. An idea of what the piece will be like is developed.
- LOVE the contrary motion in bar 3
- In bar 3, the second set of semiquavers involves LOTS of ledger lines. Looks very exaggerated. Maybe try replacing with an ottava
- Chords chosen in bar 7 are effective in continuing the melody line, however this may just be me (and for all I know, a better pianist will tackle it) but
I feel I must look at it again. The melody line is more legato and I'm not sure if the transition of the chords will be smooth.
- A resolve doesn't seem to occur at the key change, but rather in the middle of bar 17. Fascinating. But it seems to just keep continuing.
- The key change brings out a new character. This is good.
- A resolve comes in at bar 24, although it feels early. Here's one important thing:
I begin to feel that the piece is lacking direction. After this bar, I feel like I've basically been walking around in a circle. The melody line is beautiful but it becomes difficult to shape a story out of it, because the only really unexpected effect happened in bar 17.
- Once again, the key change brings out a new character. As I hoped for. But of course, this section is to be continued and thus I won't comment too much on it.
Praises:
- Very pleasing melody. I can imagine it as both calming and soothing (which, was probably the intended), but also suspenseful at the same time.
- Wide range of keys hit. "Simple" things like arpeggios and contrary motion well synthesised.
- The key changes over to the key of the dominant (of the original keynote) with added effect.
- Several characters observed.
- 2 against 3 was well used in my opinion
- Trills and ornaments fill in some otherwise blank spaces
Critiques:
- As mentioned above: lacks direction. The melody doesn't seem to portray something (or possibly just not yet)
- Could do with more cadences; need some more effective resolutions every now and then (hopefully this is to come). Even an interrupted cadence if you're good enough to incorporate one in the middle of the piece.
- Jamon and I both thought about this -
calm down a bit. There's beauty in simplicity every now and then; there's no need to make it so continuous unless your goal is to compose a study (which even then it should be calmer).
- The new character introduced in the key change to C# minor (unless that was E major...) presented a much slower pace. I would like to see more of these tempo changes.
Questions:
- What period of music are you aiming to reflect?
- Is this piece going to follow some form?
- Which composers influenced you to produce this work?
Overall: This piece is promising. I can see good results coming out of it. But sometimes it may help to take a piece easier rather than focus on the fanciness. Very nice job.